Want to be a better lover?Here are 5 habits you should break

Bad habits prevent you from living a fruitful, fulfilling life and become a stumbling block to accomplishing your goals. They jeopardize your health, wealth and relationships with significant others. They rob anyone of their peace of mind, energy, enthusiasm and zeal, leaving them drained, disappointed, devastated and depressed.

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I know for sure that it is not easy to change old habits but when one engages themselves fully to the process, it is certainly doable.


Bad habits are generally a way of dealing with stress and boredom. It is a way of filling in a vacuum, spending time doing something that will fill in the time; Engaging in various addictive behaviours such us drinking, smoking, shopping, nail biting, over socializing, excessive social media exposure, sexual distortion or on the reverse lazing and watching TV excessively among others.


This is an opportunity to clean out the old and welcome new good and positive habits into your life, in 2017. If you are stuck in a toxic relationship, a boring job, excessive overindulgence in substance abuse, over socialization, addictive behaviour, no money, no focus, and generally lethargic, there is hope; today is a new dawn and yes, you can let go off the old habit and thrive.


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Here are some tips to help you change old habits:


1. Recognize the need to change

Evaluate and ask yourself a simple question, “Am I content?” This should cut across every area of your life, including your health, relationships, financial status, career, physical fitness, and whatever else may be important to you.


On a scale of 1 to 10, what would you rate your life in these areas. If your rating is below average then find out what inhibits you from being at your best. One sentence that you need to say out loud is “I cannot continue living like this anymore”. It’s personal and one needs to recognize the need to effect the change.


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2. Make a plan and stick to it


It is one thing to desire change, it is another to make a decision to go for it and pull it through. Making sound decisions helps us navigate through life with more energy, enthusiasm and confidence. Any good decision will align to your purpose and this will enable you work continually at the objective with much ease. Commit yourself to something and purpose to work on it. Ask someone close to you to hold you accountable as you begin the journey. Do not focus on results but instead, focus on the journey. It helps to have cheerleaders along the journey.


3. Engage body, mind and soul


Ever heard of the saying ‘Let food be thy medicine and medicine be thy food’. Consider food your medicine and take your diet seriously. This will enhance not only your physical but mental and spiritual self.


A significant change that you can consider is altering eating habits, be more self-aware about what you consume to maintain a healthy eating habit and physical wellness. This will translate to being disciplined not only concerning food but in every other aspect of your life. Engage the mind intellectually by stimulation through the power of the written word.


4. Seek God diligently, all those that seek Him find Him. You will find strength beyond your natural abilities that will enable you to make the changes faster and more effectively. Meditation and prayer goes a long way in assisting you on this journey.


5. Make sleep a priority

Remember the kindergarten song, “early to raise and early to rise makes someone healthy and wealthy and wise” purpose to make sleep your priority, when unable to have 8 hours of sleep ensure you compensate appropriately. When you have had good sleep it makes it easier to follow through making changing effectively with positive changes.


The writer is a relationship coach and author of Marriage Built to Last